chris ozer

Parenthood brings something new everyday. This weekend Erin, Dean and I spent both days making our way to and from the same destination (the Upper East Side) with vastly different results emotionally and physically on both days. Saturday was long, challenging, and exhausting while Sunday was easy, fun, and invigorating. As parents, we learn from both the failures of Saturday and the successes of Sunday.

Saturday

Failure Lesson a.) traveling by subway from Park Slope to E. 86th St. involves at least one difficult transfer (in this case, from the yellow line to the green line). This coupled with the infrequency of trains on the weekend can make for a very long and crowded commute. 4 month olds do not like long, crowded commutes (unless you get lucky and they're asleep the whole time).

Failure Lesson b.) leaving later in the day for a such a trip means your ticking time bomb of a baby has that much shorter of a fuse, and when it blows up, it blows up big time.

Sunday

Success Lesson a.) traveling by car at 7:00 am on a Sunday morning in New York City is possibly some of the most stress free and enjoyable driving a New Yorker can experience. Cruising up the FDR Drive at 45 miles an hour as you soak up those glorious views of the city's awe-inspiring bridges and skyline makes you remember why you love this place so much. Finding free street parking 10 blocks from your destination doesn't hurt either.

Success Lesson b.) leaving early in the day for such a trip means you have ample time before your ticking time bomb goes off and you're ensured of being in the comfort of your own home for any explosions.

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Today was supposed to be a big day for us, but it came and went just like any other Sunday.  I know due dates are not an exact science, but still, you keep that one date fixed in your head for such a long time and a lot of excitement builds up along the way, there's bound to be a little bit of disappointment.  I know he'll come when he's ready--we're on his terms now.

We ended up going to see Harry Potter since everyone tells you you better go out to movies before because you're never going to be able to after.  So we did.  It was ok.  They all seem the same to me, except the characters age slightly and one lesser villain is replaced by another. 

On the way back we stopped at Bar Great Harry on Smith St for a beer for me and water for Erin.  This is another couple's activity with a rapidly dwindling shelf life, so I relished the opportunity.

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Erin, Theo and I had a fun time hanging out on the pier today down in Sheepshead Bay.  It's so great to have a car and be able to explore parts of New York that would otherwise be a pain to get to.  It's a beautiful neighborhood and Theo seems right at home with the ships going by and the wind blowing in his fur.  Pretty soon we'll be able to add our little baby boy into the mix for adventures like this.

Also, I am currently obsessed with the ShakeIt Photo app for the iPhone, which is what was used to take all of these.

                   

Click here to download:

Sheepshead_Bay.zip (3058 KB)

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Hopefully it won't happen at rush hour.

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One of the themes I want to write about in this blog is fatherhood.  I've had a lot of time to think in the past 9 months; about what it means to become a dad, what kind of dad I'll be, what my son will think of me, how to bond with him in ways that are unique to the two of us, the challenge of establishing and maintaining our relationship as I go back to work, if he'll be happy growing up in Brooklyn, and slightly less important things like what color his hair and eyes will be, what sports he'll play (not that he has to), and if he'll be as obsessed with Carolina basketball as I am (that might be a hard one to match). 

I read up on parenting (Lisa Belkin's Motherlode blog is interestingly a great resource for fathers) and grow half-terrified that I'm going to do something horribly wrong simply by virtue of the fact that I cannot nurse.  I think about all of the negative qualities in myself that I hope he won't have to struggle with, or, vice-versa, hope that he'll get his mom's cheerfulness and sense of humor.

I know, of course, that no matter what scenarios I play out in my head about what my son will be like, that he'll grow up to be whoever he wants to be.  As I picture him as a toddler walking down the sidewalks of the city, hand in hand with his mom, I think it's time to stop overthinking and just let the chips fall where they may.

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